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Author Topic: Funny cop pics/video/jokes  (Read 35114 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Frederick

  • Guest
Re: Funny cop pics/video/jokes
« Reply #60 on: November 13, 2009, 22:25:54 pm »
Shawn, the original joke is actually where it's a female.  Also, here's the video if anyone's interested.

Offline Jaka.

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  • Posts: 123
Re: Funny cop pics/video/jokes
« Reply #61 on: November 13, 2009, 22:32:33 pm »
Slovenija 12.november.2009

Police officer stops a driver:

Police: Can i see your license please

Drunk man: sure ((shows him 3 licenses))

Police: why you have 3 licenses?

Drunk man: because i was told the 2 arent waild so i stole another one

Police: what about car?

Drunk man: from naber.

Police: i wanna call him, so i can prove you didnt steal the car

Drunk man: you do not understand officer. i took the car whithout asking but ill give it back, yust i dont know when.

Police: thats a crime you are comming whith me!

Drunk man: Wait lemme drive this car back to naber

than the drunk man escaped and sadly did suecide

Frederick

  • Guest
Re: Funny cop pics/video/jokes
« Reply #62 on: November 14, 2009, 00:04:03 am »
Slovenija 12.november.2009

Police officer stops a driver:

Police: Can i see your license please

Drunk man: sure ((shows him 3 licenses))

Police: why you have 3 licenses?

Drunk man: because i was told the 2 arent waild so i stole another one

Police: what about car?

Drunk man: from naber.

Police: i wanna call him, so i can prove you didnt steal the car

Drunk man: you do not understand officer. i took the car whithout asking but ill give it back, yust i dont know when.

Police: thats a crime you are comming whith me!

Drunk man: Wait lemme drive this car back to naber

than the drunk man escaped and sadly did suecide

I'm sorry to point this out, but I really didn't see anything funny in that.

jemerson

  • Guest
Re: Funny cop pics/video/jokes
« Reply #63 on: November 14, 2009, 00:22:31 am »
I'm sorry to point this out, but I really didn't see anything funny in that.

Offline Jaka.

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Re: Funny cop pics/video/jokes
« Reply #64 on: November 14, 2009, 06:03:18 am »
yep its like a black humor  ;)
let me ask you....

show a cop 3 licenses
 tell him you stold the car

thats the weirdest thing ever hapend in SLO thats why i posted it, i dont find it funny too...

Offline Thomas_Crof

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Re: Funny cop pics/video/jokes
« Reply #65 on: November 14, 2009, 08:57:59 am »
Read this, you will  :lol:..............

Speeding
A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange:
Officer: May I see your driver's license?

Driver: I don't have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI.

Officer: May I see the owner's card for this vehicle?

Driver: It's not my car. I stole it.

Officer: The car is stolen?

Driver: That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner's card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.

Officer: There's a gun in the glove box?

Driver: Yes sir. That's where I put it after shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk.

Officer: There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?

Driver: Yes, sir.

Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation:

Captain: Sir, may I see your license?

Driver: Sure. Here it is. It was valid.

Captain: Whose car is this?

Driver: It's mine, officer. Here's the owner's card. The driver owned the car.

Captain: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there's a gun in it?

Driver: Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it. Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.

Captain: Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said there's a body in it.

Driver: No problem. Trunk is opened; no body.

Captain: I don't understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glovebox, and that there was a dead body in the trunk.

Driver: Really? Ain't that something? And I'll bet the lying sucker told you I was speeding, too ...
That really made me laugh :D

thats the weirdest thing ever hapend in SLO thats why i posted it, i dont find it funny too...
Look at the title of this topic..


Ps. Jake, u stol mai pictar!
Signed by: Thomas 'Leroy' Crof

Offline Janar

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Re: Funny cop pics/video/jokes
« Reply #66 on: November 14, 2009, 09:48:24 am »
Ps. Jake, u stol mai pictar!

These are different pics...

Offline Jaka.

  • Citizen
  • Posts: 123
Re: Funny cop pics/video/jokes
« Reply #67 on: November 14, 2009, 10:09:51 am »
- this officer is havy armed :O


- you ruined mine garden!!  :rofl:


Cadet: Sir! the phone yust crashed in me!

Offline RoryAnstruther

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Re: Funny cop pics/video/jokes
« Reply #68 on: November 14, 2009, 11:08:55 am »
Real Life Situation that happened with me and an officer I was with, who we will call "Officer"

Me: *holding radar gun* 46.
Officer: Fourty-six? (speed limit was 25)
Me: Look for yourself.
Officer: *sees the flashing 46* Alright, Let's get 'em then.. *turns on headlights, shifts to drive, catches up*
Me: Dispatch 208, 10-26.
Dis: 206 Go Ahead.
Me: *calls in traffic stop*
(car stops, Officer and I contact driver who is a 22 year old HOT college chick, we get her license/registration/insurance, which all checks out to be what we call in the business "valid and clear" (Valid license, clear of warrants))
(Officer and I walk back up)
Me: Well. We have good news and bad news.
Girl: *half crying* What?
Officer: Good news is that were not writing you a ticket today for going twenty two over.
Girl: Oh my god, thank you so much...
Officer: Bad news is my partner here is taking you to jail for reckless driving
Girl: Are you kidding me!? *starts freaking out*
Officer: I'm Just kidding... See you later, slow it down and drive safe!
Girl: You guys suck *laughing*
Former SAPD Lieutenant
Currently attending academy in real life. Wishing everyone a good game, be safe, and enjoy life.

Frederick

  • Guest
Re: Funny cop pics/video/jokes
« Reply #69 on: November 14, 2009, 11:11:10 am »
Rory, now that's what I like to see.  Officers who can have fun on the job, and drivers who can understand.  ;)

Offline JDC

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  • Discord: JDC#0664
Re: Funny cop pics/video/jokes
« Reply #70 on: November 14, 2009, 13:00:03 pm »
Real Life Situation that happened with me and an officer I was with, who we will call "Officer"

Me: *holding radar gun* 46.
Officer: Fourty-six? (speed limit was 25)
Me: Look for yourself.
Officer: *sees the flashing 46* Alright, Let's get 'em then.. *turns on headlights, shifts to drive, catches up*
Me: Dispatch 208, 10-26.
Dis: 206 Go Ahead.
Me: *calls in traffic stop*
(car stops, Officer and I contact driver who is a 22 year old HOT college chick, we get her license/registration/insurance, which all checks out to be what we call in the business "valid and clear" (Valid license, clear of warrants))
(Officer and I walk back up)
Me: Well. We have good news and bad news.
Girl: *half crying* What?
Officer: Good news is that were not writing you a ticket today for going twenty two over.
Girl: Oh my god, thank you so much...
Officer: Bad news is my partner here is taking you to jail for reckless driving
Girl: Are you kidding me!? *starts freaking out*
Officer: I'm Just kidding... See you later, slow it down and drive safe!
Girl: You guys suck *laughing*

:rofl:
Quote from: Gandalf on June 08, 2013, 01:35:37 pm
The most important part is interacting with others and meeting people from around the world.


SA:MP Manager | Officer-In-Charge (OIC), San Andreas State Government | Pope of Argonath
Retired FBI Director (MTA:VC, VC:MP) and Division Chief (SA:MP)

Offline Thomas_Crof

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  • Badge-ID: #P49
Re: Funny cop pics/video/jokes
« Reply #71 on: November 14, 2009, 13:56:11 pm »
I'd say PWNT!
Signed by: Thomas 'Leroy' Crof

Offline [R*]Drix

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Re: Funny cop pics/video/jokes
« Reply #72 on: November 14, 2009, 20:51:13 pm »
Drix: Taxiii for my Malcolm
Malcolm : Duh...




[Rstar]Pancher : I aint talking at you
Drix : Ohh common...




ohh and..

SWAT RANK CANT BELIVE IT!!

Omai.. -.-

You culdent imagine, how happy i were there. but Puff noany swat drix :(


Offline JDC

  • SA:MP Manager
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  • Discord: JDC#0664
Re: Funny cop pics/video/jokes
« Reply #73 on: November 21, 2009, 03:28:06 am »
Got a Ingame one..



Didn't knew JDC was such a.. Love cop?

Oh indeed I was :D
Quote from: Gandalf on June 08, 2013, 01:35:37 pm
The most important part is interacting with others and meeting people from around the world.


SA:MP Manager | Officer-In-Charge (OIC), San Andreas State Government | Pope of Argonath
Retired FBI Director (MTA:VC, VC:MP) and Division Chief (SA:MP)

Offline Bert

  • Ex D.P.D. Sheriff
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  • A.K.A. BKP
BKP

Frederick

  • Guest

Offline Bert

  • Ex D.P.D. Sheriff
  • Citizen
  • Posts: 753
  • A.K.A. BKP
Re: Funny cop pics/video/jokes
« Reply #76 on: November 22, 2009, 13:09:26 pm »
BKP

Offline Janar

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Re: Funny cop pics/video/jokes
« Reply #77 on: November 22, 2009, 13:27:31 pm »

Frederick

  • Guest
Re: Funny cop pics/video/jokes
« Reply #78 on: November 22, 2009, 21:52:53 pm »
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T_UWFzIkeBE&feature=related  NFS, GTA get away style

WOW, 4 times getting PIT'ed

Yeah, that's an old video.  I remember how amazed I was when I first saw it.

Offline Janar

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    • Skype - janar.argonath
Re: Funny cop pics/video/jokes
« Reply #79 on: November 23, 2009, 15:23:28 pm »
Shawn, the original joke is actually where it's a female.  Also, here's the video if anyone's interested.

Took a look on it again.
That girl reminds me some actor/actress(correct?)

 

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